Saturday, May 28, 2011

Breaking up is hard to do...

"Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women:  a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom." - Jerry Seinfeld

  That quote can go for both genders. I know that I can relate. That's what I want and I am looking for. I want someone to be there for me, just like I will be there for them. I want someone that will give me my space, just like I would do the same. I'm already claustrophobic; do you want to make be emotionally claustrophobic too? I went out with a certain "fish", and it went well. In fact, we had a 2nd "meet up" and that was a good night too. So, what was the problem you ask? HA! Well, we agreed on meeting Friday night after my Post-St. Paddy's Day celebration. He knew I would be sauced and randy. Smart guy. Sadly, something came up. I forgot that I made plans to meet with another fish for the first time. I wasn't gonna cancel, because I had some liquid courage going on. Enough to meet this new fish that was pretty damn attractive in his pics. Don't judge! Fish #1 was a cool guy, but did I see something serious in the future? No. Handful of dates? Yeah, why not? I had options and I was going to take advantage of it.
 Anyways, I told Fish #1 that I was too drunk and would love a rain-check. I needed to go home and sleep. There was no way I was going to be good company. Yes, I lied. Ugh! I hate lying, but I hate being rude and inconsiderate more. I couldn't tell him that I overbooked and had another date. (Stupid me! Looking at the outcome now, I should have.) Fish #1, somehow was already around my neck of the woods and wanted to check on me. I apologized for making him come out all the way over here (mind you, even though I never said to) and explained I didn't want to see him in this state. I didn't respond to the rest of the texts. I met Fish #2 and hit it off NICELY with him. Turned out, he was more nervous to meet me than I was. I'm so intimidating. ;)
  You're probably asking yourself now, "What was the "popped cherry" here? What was her "first"? I haven't gotten to that yet, Speed Racer! The next day, I apologized to Fish #1 again for my behavior. He responded saying things like I should keep my apologies for someone that buys it, and that when I'm ready to talk (instead of text) to give him a ring. I was fuming! I was incredibly shocked! What the hell is this guy having a hissy fit about?! I couldn't call him because 1) I was showing, my old art professor, Seattle while she was here for an art education expo and 2) I know not to have these types of talks while I'm riled up. I tend to stutter and not get to say everything that I want to. Too mad to make sense or complete sentences. I didn't respond to Fish #1, and I called him the next day. Sunday morning, after I had my coffee and breakfast, I laid on my bed and dialed this fool. I don't remember too much of what was said, but I sure remember being told that I was lying to him and shouldn't have. He asked what was he suppose to think when he gets home and sees me on google chat and on POF, instead of "sleeping it off". I could have told him that I knew I wasn't online because I was making out with a hottie in Costco's empty parking lot. I'm not that mean. Instead, I explained that my phone has a gchat app that has me logged on all the time. I also checked my POF earlier that night through my phone, which maybe kept me logged on. I also said that I didn't think I had to explain myself, and that I already apologized. If he didn't want to take it, than that was his problem. He accepted it and said he was just disappointed, because he was really looking forward to seeing me again. Crap. At this point, I was already seeing red flags, bad kind of fireworks, and neon lights telling me to stay away. He asked me out for that night, and I had to decline. I had plans to go to a friend's house for game night. I couldn't bail. He was pretty damn persistent, and wouldn't take no for an answer. He suggested to meet after game night. I told him I was tired and that I was gonna make it an early night. He "jokingly" said that he would be heart broken and lied to again if he saw me on gchat or POF, instead of sleeping. That's where I told him that I had to get ready, and we'll talk later. 
 I was creeped out. I was tired, and I was gonna call it an early night. But I'm also in the right to change my mind. If I was home and it's 10p, and I'm not sleepy, I should have the option to do something like get online or whatever I feel like. I shouldn't be worried who's gonna catch me on and what will they think? Ugh! Men! After much pep talk from my friends and practically a bottle of wine, I texted him with a simple "Fish #1, this isn't working out. I won't make it to dinner Tuesday. Take care." Yes, I texted it. At least it wasn't a post it! bwahahaha! He replied with, "W/e makes you comfortable. I kinda called this earlier. keep my number in case it stops feeling weird. still gonna root for you. get used to it. people think you're great. ;) (go gaby!)" W.........t.........I can't even finish that. 
 So there you have it ladies and gents, I have never "ended" things with someone. Why the quotes? Well, was there really anything to end in the first place?! That's why I placed the quotes, oh and try picture me doing them as air quotes. I love air quotes! 

 P.S. I'm such a heartbreaker.

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